


Deleted Scenes

by I_love_1_Android



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Bad Jokes, Dialogue-Only, Gen, Humor, Please Don't Hate Me, Toilet humor
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-27
Updated: 2018-06-27
Packaged: 2019-05-29 11:44:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 307
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15072461
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/I_love_1_Android/pseuds/I_love_1_Android
Summary: Read the title and you'll know everything you need to about this fic. this is just a collection of weird little script-lets that I write whenever an idea comes to mind. Some are silly, some are serious and some are just plain weird. Hope you enjoy





	Deleted Scenes

**(The bridge is quiet, all but for Picard who is stood staring out into space contemplating the endless possibilities of the universe and what it might hold. There is a swoosh and the turbolift behind him opens to reveal a rather disgusted looking android, DATA wearing a pair of marigolds and a pinafore.)**  
  
**Data:**  "Captain..."  
  
**Picard:** "Yes? What is it Data?"  
  
**Data:**  "I was carrying out a routine inspection on all of the on-board facilities and found that there was a little... something left in the Water Closet, or Poop Deck although I don't understand why you call it that."  
  
**Picard: "** I'll explain it some other time. Oh! That will be my captains log. I use it to keep a record of everything that happens aboard this ship. And if we ever get into any serious trouble the people that find us floating (pardon the pun) out in space can get all of the information they need about us."  
  
**Data:** "But what is the purpose for the flag?  
  
**Picard:** _(offended by the question, that was close to the bone)_   "I was proud of it. I'd not gone in six months. You do realise the food on this damned thing does nothing for the bowels"  
  
**Data:** "Nobody else has raised an issue before sir."  
  
**Picard:** "Well I'm the captain! So if I raise it it IS an issue!"  
  
**Data:** "Apologies, sir and understood"   
  
**(there is a strange grumble in the room, and both parties aren't sure from whence it came. Then Picard's face turns a vivid red shade, similar to his uniform)**  
  
**Picard:** (Embarrassed) Uhh... Commander.  You might need to check the water closet again rather promptly.  
  
**Data:** "Sir?"  
  
**(too late, Picard is in the Turbolift standing in a strange pose with his eyes scrunched tight. As the doors swoosh closed again he shouts;)**  
  
**Picard:** Just do it!  
  
  



End file.
